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07 / 12 / 2008
Fantasy Rally:
The final Fantasy Rally results are in - we have a winner! See how your team fared or see the Rally GB results.

05 / 11 / 2008
Review:
After the gruelling James Bond press junket tour, I bet Daniel Craig could use a Quantum of Solace.

23 / 10 / 2008
Review:
Brad Pitt steals the latest from the Coen brothers: Burn After Reading.

23 / 10 / 2008
Review:
Simon Pegg learns How to Lose Friends and Alienate People.

23 / 10 / 2008
Review:
Ben Stiller directs stars aplenty in Tropic Thunder.

12 / 10 / 2008
Review:
A few words on some recent movies: RocknRolla,
Death Race,
Hellboy 2: The Golden Army,
Space Chimps,
Stuck,
The Babysitters,
Starship Troopers 3: Marauder,
Son of Rambow,
Jack and Jill vs the World,
Made of Honor,
Meet Dave,
Doomsday,
Pathology.

15 / 08 / 2008
Review:
You can mess with Adam Sandler, but You Don't Mess with the Zohan.

15 / 08 / 2008
Review:
Mike Myers tickles some chakras in The Love Guru.

14 / 08 / 2008
Review:
Toot and come in, it's The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor.

14 / 08 / 2008
Review:
You can stop watching the skies now, it's The X Files: I Want to Believe.

31 / 07 / 2008
Review:
Batman Began and now continues in The Dark Knight.

24 / 07 / 2008
Review:
The Chronicles of Narnia continue with Prince Caspian.

23 / 07 / 2008
Review:
Pixar goes Short Circuit with Wall-E.

22 / 07 / 2008
Review:
Jules Verne never envisaged a 3D version of Journey to the Centre of the Earth.

09 / 07 / 2008
Review:
Jet Li and Jackie Chan team up in The Forbidden Kingdom.

09 / 07 / 2008
Review:
Will Smith keeps the streets safe and smelling of booze in Hancock.

09 / 07 / 2008
Review:
M Night Shyamalan's latest, The Happening.

09 / 07 / 2008
Review:
Spanish creepy-creepy The Orphanage.

09 / 07 / 2008
Review:
A quick catchup of movies that don't get the full treatment:
Be Kind Rewind,
Street Kings,
What Happens In Vegas,
Superhero Movie,
The Ruins and
Teeth.

08 / 07 / 2008
Review:
Bend that bullet Angelina! Wanted.

01 / 07 / 2008
Review:
Those cats were fast as lightning - Kung Fu Panda.

24 / 06 / 2008
Review:
Don't make Ed Norton angry - The Incredible Hulk.

24 / 06 / 2008
Review:
Carrie and Big's wedding, it can only be Sex and the City.

11 / 06 / 2008
Review:
Everyone's favourite pot-addicts are back in Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay.

04 / 06 / 2008
Review:
Harrison Ford returns in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

04 / 06 / 2008
Review:
Tube driver seeks suicidal man in Three and Out.

18 / 05 / 2008
Review:
CGI fantasy motor racing in Speed Racer.

18 / 05 / 2008
Review:
Your creases will fly away with Iron Man.

18 / 08 / 2005
Sudoku!
Have a go at the online Sudoku game.

Plenty more
See the rest of the reviews here.

 

Underworld Evolution

Underworld Evolution

Cast: Kate Beckinsale, Scott Speedman, Derek Jacobi, Bill Nighy, Tony Curran, Steven Mackintosh.

Directed by Len Wiseman (Kate Beckinsale's hubby).

Story: Vampires vs Werewolves, round 2.

Running Time: 1hr 45 minutes.

UK Certificate 18.

 

Underworld was something of a missed opportunity - Underworld Evolution gives Len Wiseman a chance to make amends. Does he succeed? Well, no, not really. It's just not special enough.

Scott Speedman tries screwing Kate Beckinsale's head onto Batman's body. Once again, the director's wife Kate Beckinsale takes centre stage as Selene, the vampiric hunter of werewolves - no, sorry, "Lycans". The story's too silly to go into here, suffice to say a big nasty wingy thing is after Selene and her wolfy friend and the world is in danger, yadda yadda. The story's a little tricky to follow and isn't really worth the effort but, it has to be said, the acting is spot on. Kate Beckinsale pouts and broods away in latex for all she's worth, with superb support from Derek Jacobi, Tony Curran and Steven Mackintosh (the posh wimpy pot dealer in Lock Stock). Bill Nighy returns in flashback and is breathtakingly good in a deliciously malevolent role that lets him spit his lines with pleasing ferocity. The weak link is Scott Speedman as Selene's lupine partner Michael Corvin - in this company he's comprehensively outclassed and seems half-asleep much of the time.

Steven Mackintosh yearns for a Jehovah's Witness to call. Underworld Evolution is, by and large, an effects-driven movie, and some of them are a little over-ambitious. The simpler effects are largely magnificent, but by trying to achieve too much, parts of the action sequences have become laughably comical. The helicopters, too, look about as real as Thomas the Tank Engine, and the infantile wire work - well, I've stated my position on wire-work before, it has no place in today's effects armoury. The overall atmostphere is still pretty cool though, with high-contrast lighting and slo-mo effects creating a comfortable style that is easy to watch. Thus it will appeal to the younger male audience in a Van Helsing kind of way, although this is considerably darker.

Underworld Evolution is an adequate sequel to a mediocre original. Fans of the first Underworld will be pleased and newcomers may have an entertaining enough time. Better than Blade Trinity, but then that's not saying much.

I enjoyed this film: 3/5

I think the average moviegoer will enjoy it: 4/5 - it ticks all the action boxes, after all.

Testosterone Satisfaction Rating: 5/5 - lots of gory action, a couple of gratuitious f-words, some almost-skin from Kate Beckinsale (preview here) and some actual skin from extra Kaja Gjesdal (here). The 18 certificate is a bit excessive, 15 would be more appropriate.

To enjoy this film you should be: into movies like Blade, Van Helsing etc.

 

Underworld Evolution is on general release in the UK now.