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25 / 07 / 2010
Fantasy F1:
The results from the eleventh race in Germany are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next race is Hungary next weekend on 1st August.

11 / 07 / 2010
Fantasy Rally:
The results from Rally Bulgaria are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next rally is Finland on THURSDAY 29th July (a day earlier than usual!).

11 / 07 / 2010
Fantasy F1:
The results from the tenth race in Silverstone are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next race is Hockenheim on 25th July.

27 / 06 / 2010
Fantasy F1:
The results from the ninth race in Valencia are in, including the penalties for the naughty boys driving too fast. Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next race is Silverstone on 11th July.

13 / 06 / 2010
Fantasy F1:
The results from the eighth race in Canada are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next race is Valencia on 27th June.

30 / 05 / 2010
Fantasy Rally:
The results from Rally Portugal are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next rally is Bulgaria on 9th July.

30 / 05 / 2010
Fantasy F1:
The results from the exciting seventh race in Turkey are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next race is Canada on 13th June.

16 / 05 / 2010
Fantasy F1:
The Monaco scores have been updated to reflect Michael Schumacher's ridiculous penalty for daring to overtake a Ferrari. Check the updated results, see how your team did or enter a new team.

16 / 05 / 2010
Fantasy F1:
The results from the sixth race in Monaco are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next race is Turkey on 30th May.

10 / 05 / 2010
Fantasy F1:
The results from the fifth race in Barcelona are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next race is Monaco on 16th May.

10 / 05 / 2010
Fantasy Rally:
The results from Rally New Zealand are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next rally is Portugal on 28th May.

19 / 04 / 2010
Fantasy Rally:
The results from Rally Turkey are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next rally is New Zealand on 7th May.

18 / 04 / 2010
Fantasy F1:
The results from the fourth race in China are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next race is Barcelona on 9th May.

06 / 04 / 2010
Fantasy Rally:
The JWRC driver lineup has been released, so you can make your selection before teams are frozen for Turkey on the night of 15th April. If you don't pick anyone, you'll get Aaron Burkart by default.

05 / 04 / 2010
Fantasy F1:
The results from the third race in Malaysia are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next race is China on 18th April.

03 / 04 / 2010
Fantasy Rally:
The results from Rally Jordan are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next race is Turkey on 14th April.

29 / 03 / 2010
Fantasy F1:
The results from the second race in Melbourne are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next race is Malaysia THIS WEEKEND on 4th April.

14 / 03 / 2010
Fantasy F1:
The results from the first race in Bahrain are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next race is Australia on 28th March.

09 / 03 / 2010
Fantasy F1!
Yes, there's a brand new Fantasy Formula One game! Check the rules or enter your team by Friday night to qualify for the first race in Bahrain!

08 / 03 / 2010
Fantasy Rally:
The results from Rally Mexico are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team. Next race is Jordan on 1st April.

17 / 02 / 2010
Fantasy Rally:
The points awarded for a win have changed in the real WRC, so we've reflected the changes in our scoring too. Check the rules to see the details. Next rally is Mexico on 5th March, teams will be frozen at midnight on the night of Thursday 4th March.

16 / 02 / 2010
Fantasy Rally:
The results from Rally Sweden are in! Check the results, see how your team did or enter a new team.

31 / 01 / 2010
Fantasy Rally:
The new rally season is upon us - 2010 Fantasy Rally is now open! Check the rules or pick a team ready for the start on 12th Feb.

25 / 10 / 2009
Fantasy Rally:
All previous years' Fantasy Rally results are online - Check the 2009 season.

02 / 08 / 2009
Reviews:
Sorry, there won't be any more movie reviews for the foreseeable future. Events have overtaken me. Catch up on reviews you may have missed.

18 / 08 / 2005
Sudoku!
Have a go at the online Sudoku game.

 

Assault on Precinct 13 (2005)

Assault on Precinct 13 Cast: Ethan Hawke, Laurence Fishburne, Gabriel Byrne, Maria Bello, John Leguizamo, Brian Dennehy, Drea de Matteo, Ja Rule.

Directed by Jean-François Richet.

Story: A remake of the 1976 John Carpenter movie sees a closing Detroit police precinct under siege.

Running Time: 1hr 49 minutes.

Certificate 15.

 

Nothing special here - a police station on its last night of operation is placed under siege. There's lots of shooting, lost of killing and lots of who-can-I-trust shenanigans. This time next year you won't even remember you saw it, but for an evening's escapism you could do a lot worse.

Morpheus has an off day. I've a feeling this is going to be a pretty short review. There simply isn't a lot I can say without ruining the plot for you. I can say that the police station is under siege, because that's pretty much implied by the title, and I can say that it doesn't all go according to the Hollywood Rules for Scripts - I was most surprised by one particular turn of events - but other twists are carefully suggested by subtle headshots to help the audience feel smug that we saw it coming. Ethan Hawke is the man of the movie, we know that because he's in the opening scene that skilfully maps the character. Immediately afterwards, we are introduced to sassy psychiatrist Maria Bello and learn that Mr Hawke has some issues to deal with (surely not). Gabriel Byrne is Big Police Honcho Man who has just brought Big Bad Cop-Killing Ooze-Silent-Menace Guy Laurence Fishburne into captivity in the snowbound Precinct 13 on the last night of its operation before being moved across town. Well look at that, it turns out I could tell you quite a lot without ruining it after all.

Ethan Hawke decides venetian blinds are more trouble than they're worth. To be honest there isn't very much to say - it's an action movie and it works nicely, I don't resent paying six quid to see it but I won't be placing it on my you-gotta-see-this list. Laurence Fishburne's Morpheus-minus-morals performance is by far the most memorable, though John Leguizamo and Maria Bello both contribute beautifully judged characters. Ethan Hawke, while not doing anything wrong, is a little upstaged by his colleagues, but that helps to convey his difficulty in returning to real life-and-death police work (one of his "issues"). As the siege progresses, the story develops cogently and there is a real how-the-hell-are-they-getting-out-of-this-one sense as the tension mounts. Stories such as this one will never be totally believable, but Assault is pretty close. Each potential why-didn't-they-do-that hole is confronted and addressed, which really helps the watchability of the film. The ending is the only part that I wasn't comfortable with - it felt tacked on, as if not as much thought had been put into it as the remainder, however it didn't detract from what is a simple but effective action siege movie.

Maria Bella, shurley? Connoisseurs of the action genre, however, may be disappointed. Assault on Precinct 13 offers nothing new or particularly exciting - though teenage boys will appreciate the gratuitous shots of the knife-in-the-eye deaths - it's just a competently crafted tale with killing in it, so in a way it's an action movie for non-fans of action movies.

I enjoyed this film: 4/5

I think the average moviegoer will enjoy it: 3/5

Testosterone Satisfaction Rating: 3/5 Some gratuitously graphic violence, lots of shooting.

To enjoy this film you should: Appreciate simple violent action.